Tuesday, January 24, 2012


another i was obsessed with since birth
is there is some comfort in nude posing
& a good thing is when i know that,
that what i'm doing isn't special,
even if medicated & a little disgusting.
accepting the scary as they are
isn't just necessary.
i want to help tell the story obviously
but it's your story
& i was wondering your thoughts on that.
there's a chance that someone
is going to stab me in the chest
& i will spontaneously combust.

Tuesday, January 3, 2012


for the last day
i haven't gone a day
with simply something
as mundane as that.
but then the concept of
the sober mind is
a little presumptuous.
the key is to find it
in total negating and simultaneous
affirming, as in
'every' may be different
names for the one thing
but not in fact;
if they were the same
they would be the same,
but not even the same is.

it's often difficult
to stop caring in day-to-day life
because i love it,
which is a positive thing,
but doesn't totally consist
of positive interactions.
converting all that via an alien
altogether inappropriate freedom,
in this i can like now
think a thing with almost
no planning.  it's even stranger
what i need for no planning.

i hold a pen in a very strange way
which is fetishized
which i don't want
to turn something into
something uncomfortable, awkward,
into something into surface.
in this i don't write something into moments
of no planning.
most are passed while looking forward
for the moment to pass
& most of moments do this whether
or not they've been planned.
since the morning of the first
feeling that is almost sweet,
moments have mostly been lonely
but still they're there.